Category Archive for: ‘Compassion’

  • Relationship repair part 8 of 10

    This is an edited extract of a longer article, which can be found here 8. Think support. You can make changes on your own but it is a lot easier with support. Obvious support are people in your close network – your friend who encourages […]

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  • Why you will marry the wrong person

    A provocative statement to raise your awareness and bring some humility into your love life. To soften the edges of certainty about a new relationship or about your long term committed relationship. Here’s the Anthony de Botton video about this.

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  • FIFO relationship

    Long distance commuting – fly, drive or bus Is it hard being a FIFO wife? I get asked this constantly. I also get oh you poor thing being on your own all that time coping with the kids. However, my take on it is this […]

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  • Self-compassion and self-esteem

    Self-compassion provides a sense of self-worth, but it’s not linked to narcissism the way self-esteem is. It’s not linked to social comparison the way self-esteem is, and it’s not contingent, because you have self-compassion both when you fail and when you succeed. The sense of […]

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  • On vulnerability part 2.

    When we were children, we used to think that when we were grown-up we would no longer be vulnerable. But to grow up is to accept vulnerability… To be alive is to be vulnerable. Madeleine L’Engle Steps to increase your ability to be vulnerable and […]

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  • Individual therapy sessions

    I am interested in how we relate to our internal experiences. It is like a matrix of family relationships inside ourselves. Sometimes it could be likened to a couple: a top dog and an underdog; a part that criticizes us and a part that shuts […]

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  • Top 5 regrets of the dying

    Link to source of the top five regrets of the dying 1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me. “This was the most common regret of all. When people realise that their […]

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  • Fear and shame in couple communication

    The number one myth about relationships is that talking helps. More often than not it makes things worse. When couples feel connected, men want to talk more and women need to talk less. According to Stosny’s analysis of several hundred human and animal studies, male […]

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  • Family business-owning couples 4

    DEAL BREAKER Number 2 – Intimate competition In their early 30’s Kerry and Pat fired each other up at the beginning of their wine business. As the enterprise grew their natural competitiveness spurred them on to more innovative and more efficient solutions. It worked for […]

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  • How Gottman predicts separation/divorce 6

    THE SIXTH SIGN: BAD MEMORIES “When a relationship gets subsumed in negativity, it’s not only the couple’s present and future life together that are put at risk. Their past is in danger, too. Couples who are deeply entrenched in a negative view of their spouse […]

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  • Lucy & Bart 3

    FLOODING This fictional couple have been struggling with self-limiting interactions for about six years. Mostly they have a great time with each other. Have similar senses of humour and share most of their leisure activities. Apart from his choice of franchise, they share many core […]

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  • Lucy & Bart 2

    THE CAVALRY ARRIVES Lucy and Bart’s capacity to know and feel their experience in the moment is at an embryonic stage of development. This is true of all humanity. We place all sorts of interruptions in the way of experiencing what is happening inside ourselves. […]

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