Archives

Category Archive for: ‘Connection’

  • What to read before coming to couple therapy

    The book that best represents emotion focussed couple therapy is “Hold Me Tight” by Sue Johnson and the workbook to go with that is “An Emotionally Focused Workbook for Couples: The Two of Us” by Veronica Kallos-Lilly and Jennifer Fitzgerald. I reckon these two books […]

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  • Sex and aging

    Look Peter the basic problem is the old guys are losing their oomph and they need a younger woman’s sex drive to even get it up. They got bored in their first and second marriage and leave when something risky and hot comes along. You […]

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  • FIFO relationship

    Long distance commuting – fly, drive or bus Is it hard being a FIFO wife? I get asked this constantly. I also get oh you poor thing being on your own all that time coping with the kids. However, my take on it is this […]

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  • Self-compassion and self-esteem

    Self-compassion provides a sense of self-worth, but it’s not linked to narcissism the way self-esteem is. It’s not linked to social comparison the way self-esteem is, and it’s not contingent, because you have self-compassion both when you fail and when you succeed. The sense of […]

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  • On vulnerability part 3.

    Quotations on: Vulnerability Where we have strong emotions, we’re liable to fool ourselves. Carl Sagan We’re never so vulnerable than when we trust someone – but paradoxically, if we cannot trust, neither can we find love or joy. Walter Anderson To love at all is […]

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  • On vulnerability part 2.

    When we were children, we used to think that when we were grown-up we would no longer be vulnerable. But to grow up is to accept vulnerability… To be alive is to be vulnerable. Madeleine L’Engle Steps to increase your ability to be vulnerable and […]

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  • Steps to ending a relationship

    I do not believe that sheer suffering teaches. If suffering alone taught, all the world would be wise, since everyone suffers. To suffering must be added mourning, understanding, patience, love, openness and the willingness to remain vulnerable. Joseph Addison Try some or all of these […]

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  • A new love

    A new love is not only a new beginning. We carry into it all our old stuff – whatever we may tell ourselves that this time it is different. Our carry-on luggage is in the overhead compartment of our heart ship – in the limbic […]

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  • Re-build rapport and trust

    Steps to rebuilding trust may be the same as starting a new relationship. Even in long term committed relationships, partners can become strangers to each other. More so when there has been a breach of trust. It can be awkward to start again. What should […]

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  • Top 5 regrets of the dying

    Link to source of the top five regrets of the dying 1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me. “This was the most common regret of all. When people realise that their […]

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  • Women shaming men

    I was not prepared (she writes) to hear over and over from men how the women – the mothers, sister, girlfriends, wives – in their lives are constantly criticising them for not being open and vulnerable and intimate. This subject is a constant in my […]

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  • Failure to disclose at outset of relationship

    When do you tell your new partner relationally significant history – at the outset or wait until the right time. The latter usually post dates the disclosure to a time when the partner may feel they entered the relationship under false pretences. That is, had […]

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